4 things people find most challenging about divorce.
Harderwijk, 28 february 2017. I practice law for 31 years now and what I have heard from people that have consulted me concerning their divorce is that there are certain things that are most challenging for them.

  1. One is the stress and uncentainty as a consequence of their choice to end their marriage. Do I have to look for a new home?
  2. Do I see the kids in future and can I be there for them?
  3. What about my income, will it be enough to live on?
  4. The most challenging for people are fights concerning money and the fight over the kids.

After practising law for 16 years I therefore have chosen to become a mediator, to help them communicate effectively and fight less.

The main challenge is that 80% of all marriage that end in divorce could have been saved, if we had learned to deal with money. And yes, we are accountable ourselves and the curriculum in schools and at universities are determined by the government for centuries and will be inthe future if we don’t do something. Their self interest is that we stay dependent on them and we keep on paying our taxes.


Since in Europe and the US we are getting poorer the last 40 to 50 years per capita, although the GNP might still be growing, government has a growing challenge and that is that they can’t generate enough taxes any more and the problem gets bigger and bigger now the middle class is getting smaller and smaller.

These same people that haven’t learned to deal with money also work with the government and they are structurely spending more then the government earns.

Everybody that earns less then he or she is spending will get into trouble eventually. The government is no exception, although they think otherwise. So there is no self interest for the government to do anything about it and train children in primary school in financial skills. We have to do it ourselves because like I said we are accountable.

A divorce is most of the times a wake up call, to take the responsibility for your life and your finances into your own hands. There is no simple solution, because it is all about mindset. In the meantime your divorce has to be settled in an effective way.

If you have any question call me at: 071-5249316, or send me a mail to: oosthout@oosthoutadvocatuur.nl